By Kathy, NHY Alumni
At NHY, we have individual sessions and group sessions. Lately, clients have been letting themselves go. They have been letting their true feelings show at the therapy sessions. There is one girl that really catches my eye in here. I have become interested in her life, her feelings and her true self. She is experiencing a lot of stress and feelings. I can see, and feel, that she has a lot on her mind. Don’t get me wrong, other girls here have a lot on them too, but I don’t know what it is that intrigues me - she just has so much. I can’t say her name, but I am going to call her "Sammy".
What can I say about her? She grew up amongst a lot of gang violence. She doesn’t really have her mom in her life. Like, she just has her sister, brother, and dad. It’s sad because I wish my mom can be her mom. I can feel her sadness when she says she wishes she had her mom. She wishes her mom would cuddle with her. It’s just - like sad. I personally don’t even know what to say or what to think when she says she needs her mom; when she says she wants to see her mom; when she wants to talk to her mom and stuff like that. I feel useless and like a dummy, because I can’t do anything about it and I don’t want her to be feeling that way.
When she’s really happy, it’s like she’s a whole different person. "Sammy" loves to dance, loves to sing, and loves to have all the attention. She’s just this wonderful, delightful girl. Like, it’s crazy because you wouldn’t even guess she has a lot of problems when you can see her walk around the house, or if you were to see her walk around town. You wouldn’t even guess she has a lot on her mind. You wouldn’t even guess she had a messed up childhood. Her past life is probably the reason why she does drugs. The reason why she does what she does. Well, I mean to say why she did what she did, because now that she is in NHY she’s ready to change her life downside up. Yeah and NHY is going to help her.
Little by little, it all starts with Group & Individual sessions. This one time we did a group session and one of the staff members who works with us made us do this little project. It was about writing a letter to our moms, but instead of putting “you” we had to put me and I, whatever went with that sentence. When we all read our letters, it was deep. It made us cry. Like, when Sammy read hers, it basically showed how she was talking to herself. At the end, she mentioned that it felt like she was talking to herself. It’s really crazy how when you talk about, how you think your mom won’t trust you, it’s really you not trusting yourself. How the way you think your mom will react to something you've said or done, in reality is how you are thinking she is going to react. It is your own personal reaction. Basically, when you are thinking that you’re talking to your mom, you are really talking to yourself. I recommend that everybody who’s hurt try this exercise. It's one of the steps that helps you find your true self. I just love group sessions, because they are really helping me become my true self.